Tuesday, February 28, 2006

Submission Rule - Do Not Send Confetti With Your Submission

I mentioned writing rules in the previous post, so I decided to add a submission rule. Just because I happen to come across it today.

Okay, this would be funny if it wasn't sad.

Slush God wrote today of "the most obnoxious slush submission EVER."
Apparently someone added little shiny stars to his/her submission and they were sticky to boot.

I can just imagine an editor opening an envelope of a submission and out fly confetti and fall all over the editor, her desk, the floor, her hair. That submission goes straight into the garbage with the confetti, without even looking for the SASE.

Which reminds me of another story I've heard, this time about an emailed submission where the writer introduced himself and the story for more than 500 words (how great he and his story is).
Anyway, two minutes later he sent another email. This time with the attachment of the story...

So don't be obnoxious, keep cover letters to the minimum necessary and be professional, which alas does mean - no confetti!

As I said, it would have been funny if it wasn't sad.

Categories: , , ,

10 comments:

Jennifer said...

I'm sorry, I can't stop laughing at the confetti. Seriously? Confetti!

Wow. I probably would have collected the confetti put it in the return envelope with a rejection letter and sent it back :D

(just my odd sense of humor)

Confetti!?!?! *shaking my head and laughing still*

melly said...

I know. It is totally funny...
Oh but it is sad too.

Chris Howard said...

How strict is this rule? What about e-confetti for e-subs? It spills out of the email all over the editor's desktop, hiding icons, pixel-drifts of it blowing around like snow... never mind.

Doesn't every manuscript guidelines page have a paragraph on what to do and not to do? Most editors are explicit about rejecting anything close to a gimmick, they don't have time for them.

You're absolutely right, funny as well as sad, but I like Jennifer's idea for sending it all back with a reject.

Pat Kirby said...

How about spiders? Yeah, spiders? Hee.

Seriously, there's a story out there about some weirdo that included dead spiders with a sub.

Nienke Hinton said...

These people should be in marketing or advertising, not writing!

Melly said...

LOL Chris.
No, it's a really not a strict rule. I might send a box of chocolate instead, hoping it melts all over my ms. on the way.
BTW, someone took your advice and just emailed me e-confetti :)
You can imagine how I laughed.

Spiders with chocolate would be good, or perhaps ants with chocolate...
Spiders??? Pat, really?

Nienke, but even their marketing sucks :)

Jean said...

I'd say "unbelievable" or "you must be joking," but, sadly, I know it's not, and you weren't.

melly said...

Jean, my sentiments too.
When I first read this on the Slush God site, I didn't know whether to laugh or shake my head sadly...

Charles said...

When I worked in publishing we received submissions from one particular agent containing Godiva chocolates. These did not help her submissions get published, BUT they did ensure that they were swiftly opened.

Melly said...

Ummmm Godiva chocolates...
I guess that as long as it's wrapped well and doesn't melt all over the ms. it might be a good thing?