Anatomy of a Super Bowl Party

A friend just forwarded me this chain of emails:
Five guys, Bubba, Dani, Bonehead, Brent and Felix, deciding on what to eat on Super Bowl Sunday.
And here I thought that what mattered was the game…

Bubba writes:

Gentlemen:

After further discussions with interested parties, it appears due to popular demand (for KFC skin only) that the Super Bowl party will be held at my house this year.

Not certain, but I think my HD channels get American commercials, so that will be good. The food will be shit as usual.

See you there.

Dani Writes:

This is the breakthrough we've been waiting for.

Bubba writes:

Felix, you up yet?

Just kidding - I couldn't sleep b/c I am so worried about the menu for Super Bowl.

I still think KFC is completely unnecessary, but I require a 3 person majority to cancel it in its entirety.

After further discussions with Bonehead last night, it appears the inclusion of "big-ass" rigatoni might sway him a little further to the right side.

Also, keeping in mind that I am doing the ordering and that Rossetti's Pizza is best left to just Schneider's pepperoni by itself, I am willing to entertain thoughts of additional toppings. Dani, this does not include salty, hairy fish.

I believe the final menu should look like this:

3 orders of Rigatoni with Meat Sauce

2 orders of Veal (both with hot peppers instead of green peppers, and one no cheese).

1 Large Pizza with Schneider's Pepperoni

(Note: Proper Italian Buns will be purchased at a bakery earlier in the day and provided so that veal sangwiches can be assembled)

Dani Writes:

I'm ok with the above........but, may I suggest, 3 orders of veal and 2 orders of pasta instead of the other way around? Pasta is so filling.....

3/5 = 0.6 orders per person. Yes, I think I can eat 0.6 orders in one sitting....as long as it is not in a sandwich (I'd have some pasta too).

Also: remember those apps Brent had? Remember those baked potato skins from TGIF? Should I bring?

Bonehead Writes:

Dan, I disagree. Bubba's order makes more sense. This is what I plan to eat:

Bonehead's Check List
- assorded appetizers
- half to 3/4 order of pasta
- 1 veal sandwich
- 1 slice of pizza
- assorted desserts

Brent writes:

So Bon Jovi walked right by me yesterday and I got tackled by some 18 year old YP trying to get to him. Ya baby.

Bubba writes:

More importantly, what about the ribs from last year. That was nice.

Brent writes:

The ribs can be incorporated into the program but I am worried that I would be opening up a whole new can of worms.

If you guys handled the diplomacy for the US and the EU, Iran and Hammas would be none issues.

Bubba writes:

I might have a way to solve all the world's problems.

I am going to ask Cousin Alex to attend. If he says yes, we will get three orders for 6 people, bringing it to 1/2 order per person - less than the 0.6 Dani is lobbying for, yet an increase from the 0.4 that Bonehead seeks.

However, we will wait to see how the supreme ayatollah of Rossetti's sees all of this. FELIX, where are you?

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Categories: superbowl